Don’t you wish there was an easy way? Surely the path doesn’t have to be so damn hard.

Forget your dreams and settle into your nice little life. But you know you will die of boredom, possibly literally. You tried that way and it sucks.

Sometimes I wish I were a different sort of animal. Someone who fits the world as it is. But I don’t seem to fit. Does anyone?

If I did fit, I imagine I could have a nice job, a mortgage, a picket fence and 2.3 kids. Instead I fight it all. I’m a creator. I have to keep asking questions. It’s in my nature.

When I stop doing that, I lose myself. I pretend it’s all ok but I fade into watercolour. I am washed out. I have no energy.

When I wake up again, I want to break dishes. Get me to that Greek wedding!

The easy way is hard

It goes wrong when I take the easy way out. When I give up on myself and my dreams, it all goes wrong. The easy way doesn’t work for me. That way feels heavy. It is an opium den. It might look easy but it’s destructive and deadly.

When the easy way is not the right path for you, it is really the hard way. It never gets any better. You lose direction and wander around in circles, dazed and thirsty.

What do you need to be?

I need to write, create and question.  I am a dreamer and I love the power of a good story. I do not love rules. I like to make it up as I go.

  • What do you need to be?
  • What do you love?
  • Who are you, even if it’s inconvenient?

Being less sensible

There are many sensible things I should do but when I put those things first, I hate my life.

I have to put creation first because that’s me being me. That’s me filling my contract with some mysterious God-force. That’s how I’m made, like it or not.

When I’ve created something, I can handle supermarkets, admin, call-centres, home maintenance and  a world with too many storage solutions.

Without creation, I can barely think of a reason to get up in the morning.

What do you need to put first?

What do you need to put first on your list? It may not be the dishes, your day job, or even those you love. It may not make any sense to anyone else but you still need to do it.

  • What makes you feel right in your own skin?
  • If you had a contract with God, what would it say?
  • What sort of animal are you?
  • What does that animal need to do?

You are who you are

Probably, none of us really fit the form. We’re all different. None of us really fit in, exactly. We all need to be who we are and sometimes that’s hard. But when you stop, you are giving up on the fight to live.

I really need to work at creation. It’s what I’m made for, it’s what I love, it’s who I am, like it or not. It’s not easy but it has to be done.

It’s inconvenient but it’s a fight worth fighting. It’s a reason to be alive. It makes colours bright again.

Angled across the stream

Someone once told me to swim with the stream and cut across it diagonally.

Maybe you can’t have what you want right now but you still need to cross over to a new life without exhausting yourself.

I can tell you that pouting on the wrong side of the stream doesn’t work. Get in the water, swim strong, rest a little, use the flow for a while, then keep on swimming.